Give yourself time to feel what you are feeling in the moment.
When you are rushing into "getting out of it, stopping it or distracting yourself", often it means there is a fear underneath of never getting out of that specific feeling or state of being. A fear of getting stuck in that state, whichever that is. Other times is the fear of simply feeling the feeling, the fear of feeling the fear itself.
The problem is that as long as you fear feeling the fear, and avoid it, the fear will be “bigger” than you and it will be in control whether you see it or not, whether you would like to admit it or not.
If the opposite happens. That you are feeling in a way that you like, and you hold on to it so much that you don’t want it to ever pass, clinging to it with such eagerness, then there is the fear of losing that state or feeling ..
Only you can recognize these subtle layers within yourself.
Only you can sit with yourself, feel and listen, accept what comes, observe it regardless of the fear .. The fear is OK, the fear is normal. The rejection and avoidance of fear is actually making the fear control you.
When you look and feel deeper and you see and accept the layer of fear underneath .. you accept it to yourself. When you get to be OK with feeling it, OK with IT being there .. you are the one with the handle, it cannot control you anymore and yet it is not about you controlling IT either... it's about you being OK with yourself feeling IT and allowing it to be while you learn from why is there in the first place. And this is the beauty of a PART of the healing process, PART of coming back to yourself... part of knowing yourself.
Learning to be friends with your fears is one of the greatest things you will ever do for yourself
- By Evy Y. Parkinson